SHOW TRIP BUILDER Open Arrow

Open Arrow SHOW TRIP BUILDER SHOW TRIP BUILDER Open Arrow

Christmas Cracker Jokes

Published on Jul 6, 2018

We all love a good Christmas cracker joke, however corny. Here are a few of the Office Christmas team’s favourites. Email your Christmas cracker joke to us and we’ll post it here!

 

What do reindeer hang on their Christmas trees?

…Horn-aments!

 

What did Cinderella say when the chemist lost her photographs?

Someday my prints will come.

 

What do you get if you eat Christmas decorations?

Tinsilitis!

 

Why did the elf put his bed in the fireplace

Because he wanted to sleep like a log

 

What does Santa suffer from if he gets stuck in a chimney?

Claustrophobia!

 

Who beats his chest and swings from Christmas cake to Christmas cake?

Tarzipan!

 

What do you call Santa’s little helpers?

Subordinate clauses!

 

Why was Cinderella such a poor football player?

Because she kept running away from the ball!

Because she had a pumpkin for a coach! (Christine Garnham @ Berg Kaprow Lewis)

 

What food do you get when you cross a snowman with a polar bear?

A “brr” – “grr”!

 

What do angry mice send to each other at Christmas?

Cross-mouse cards!

 

What do you call a bunch of chess players bragging about their games in a hotel lobby?

Chess nuts boasting in an open foyer.

 

How did Darth Vadar know what Luke was getting for Christmas?

Because he felt his presents.

 

Who looks after Father Christmas when he is ill?

The National Elf Service.

 

What is Santa’s favourite pizza?

One that is deep-pan, crisp and even

 

Who hides in the bakery at Christmas?

Mince Spies!

 

What Christmas drink gets on your nerves?

Eggnagg

 

What’s a snowman’s favourite mode of transport?

An icicle!

 

What is an Ig?

An Eskimos home without a loo! (Joke courtesy of Beverley Randall, Tuthill)

 

Read more blogs.